fears

I am afraid.
nothing scary, but it holds me in its grasp and I stress...

After reading this post by Anna of Noodlehead fame--I don't feel alone.
not completely.

This was my comment on her blog after reading this:

"i fear wasting fabric...the fabric industry is so cruel...it turns over fabrics too fast and just when i get the nerve to use my beloved fabric it goes OOP and i can't get it anymore. i stand stuck in this place.
my husband does not understand.
nice to know that someone else does :)"

note: OOP means Out Of Print.
as in done.
gone.
finished.
nada.
a bazillion dollars on Ebay for the world's last remaining fat quarter that someone else is selling because they were smarter than me and bought lots so now they can share it and get their projects done.

hmph.

yes. it's the strawberries all over again.
why do I obsess?

My hubby asures me "we can buy more fabric.
They will design fabric that I like just as much. take it one project at a time."

Problem is that it takes me MONTHS to finally begin a project and then the amount of fabric I have limits my creativity.

Fabric is expensive!
I don't want to waste it!

'cause once it's gone. it's gone.
so sad.

Hubs said to me the other day,
"you're getting a nice little stash of fabric now. Great for creativity."

umm...yeah.
except, no.
practically every piece of fabric I have was bought for a purpose.

It's not a stash.
It's a hoard.
waiting it's turn.
hmmmmm.....
time is also a problem.

I'm not entering any more quilt bees so that I can work on my own stuff.
promise.

what's that?
no I'm not crossing my fingers behind my back.

Swaps don't count do they?

hmmm.... could someone pass the strawberries please?

TO BE CONTINUED...

He's a CLEANER!

You know Mr. Clean?

yeah.

The bald guy on the commercials?

The one with the earring?

mmm hmmm....

Well he lives in my house.

I know aren't I lucky?!

Only....

Except he's not bald -- he's blonde.

And no earrings --

but he is tall and has a cute butt!

*giggle*

I married a Dutchman and I DO recommend it.

He cleans like no one I've ever known.

And the sick part is he likes it!

He likes a clean house.

A tidy home.

He can't go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink

and we can't leave a mEsSy house over the weekend because

"no one likes to come home to a mess"

and it's TRUE.

It's nice to live in order.

I do believe he is somewhat...

shall we say...

anal (read as compulsive)

--but in his defense--

I think it's genetic.

Regardless,

he vacuums, dusts, cleans the floors

and at this very moment

before he sits down to enjoy his book

he is swiffering the house.

It's a near nightly routine.

And where am I?

What am I doing?

Sitting on my butt

surfing the net and

eating chips.

Yeah this is the life.

Now don't get me wrong,

this isn't the ONLY good thing about the Dutch...

they also know how to make a mean dessert!

p.s. I LOVE my husband.

In fact,

I *BIG PUFFY HEART* HIM !!

and we all know that that kind of love is saved for only 2 things...

husbands

and MODA FABRIC!

*big smile*

No Time

It's busy around here

and I feel constantly that I have no time.

I mean,

yeah,

I have the same 24 hours in the day that you do...

...unless you are Australian and then I have the opposite 24 hours

but you get what I'm saying,

right?

(yes, this is my sewing studio--at least I don't have to worry about stray threads)

My quilt along sits waiting for me to spend time with it.

So sad.

I have grand plans for making Pumpkin's teacher's end of the year gift.

Since the end of the year is next Wednesday

I'd say I might need to prioritize.

The apples aren't going to make themselves!

So that brings me to Father's Day.

How did it get here so fast?!

And how is it that I didn't find this really GREAT idea

until yesterday?!

And now I have to somehow make it happen!

Ooooh the pressure I place upon myself!

so please excuse me but I must get on with my day.

As you can see I have some work ahead of me.

For the first time in a while I'm glad the hubby won't be home for dinner.

He's sad that he has a business meeting

and I'm just thrilled that the extra 2 hours will give me time to clean

it all up before he comes home!

Wish me luck!

Missing my Daddy

I suppose it's time to share a bit about my dad.

He was my best friend in so many ways.

He was the life of the party.

(Once you got him there)

When he loved something it was with every inch of him.
There was no halfway with him.
He loved my brother and I with the love of a mother bear for her cub.

I would share so many stories of his heroism in my life.

But I can't.

Not right now.

But I will share something that bothers me everyday.

I am unloading the dishwasher;

I look at a drinking glass that my dad gave Hubby a couple of years back.

He gave him a set actually--

of 007 James Bond drinking glasses.

(I found this pic on a classifieds site called Kijiji. I might have to buyit.)

Hubby and my Dad share the love of James Bond.

The glasses were my dad's favourites and they're nice and big for us for meal times.

Since moving we now have a new dishwasher which does a great job;

no complaints--except that the decals on my dad's glasses are being washed away and fading with each wash.

Fading.
Just like I feel he has done.
Just as the disease took him from vibrant to gray.

(my father battled ALS/Lou Gehrig's disease for 3 years)

Just like he is now faded out of our reach.

I turn the glass over in my hand and consider packing them up for safe keeping....

but dad wouldn't want me to.

They were his favourites and everyone in the family has used them.
Dad gave them to Hubby 'cause he knew he'd love them.

Yes they're fading but we think of him everytime we get a drink-

James Bond or no James Bond.

Just like James, Dad has just gone onto his next assignment.

I guess I'm just going to have to get used to that.